May!

What better time to create a new post than in the middle of trying to write an essay...and nearly falling asleep. I'm sitting at a table in the college library before my psychology class. I'm so looking forward to this summer. :) Oddly enough, one day after my last post, I started dating my current boyfriend! Yes, I have one of those. It's been wonderful. We've been together almost two months.

I have to roll my eyes at myself for all the times I've changed my mind, but I've decided I want to do both film and sign language. There's a deaf woman at my work who I've been practicing with, and I seriously just think it is so much fun. I believe it takes two years of school to be an interpreter...I'm not sure about film. In any case, I'm looking forward to figuring out the details. Right now, I'm just focusing on saving up for Portland. I'm happy to say a lot of little frustrating things at work are being resolved—efficiency increasing and all those things that I love. Change... So, I'm feeling better about staying where I'm at. At least for now. This summer I will need to apply for a new job and find a place to live. I don't know if he will see this but I really hope my brother will come with me. He's graduating this year.

It kind of blows my mind to think about how much has changed since I was in his place. This period of my life has helped me realize who is really important to me, and I plan to hang on to the new friends I've made. I cannot wait for Sue to visit me. I'm not going to work as much this summer, so I want to have as much fun as possible. I want to take a zumba class with my mom and with Sue! I want to go free running! I want to play hacky sack! I want to watch all the shows I've fallen behind on! I want to get a tan and float the river! I want to make music! Maybe I'll even join a martial arts class! All I know is that it will be wonderful. :)

I'm also excited for my 19th birthday. It's in 18 days. I need to think of something to do...

Anticipation

It has been a terribly long time since I last wrote. I apologize—even if no one cares because I know these posts just go up on my google plus automatically and the only people who see are those weirdos (mom) that go on google plus. ;)

The past few months have consisted of going to work, going to school and sorting out my plans for the future. Now that things have pretty much settled in, I thought it an appropriate time to share about it. Finals week begins Monday, but I only have to endure one dreadful Tuesday, and winter term will be OVER!!! Finally. Goll. For spring term I'm taking Intro to Art History, Psychology, Human Sexuality and Yoga. Next year I'll have to take 15 credits per term and work less. It'll be challenging, but I'm expecting more financial aid next year so I won't need to work as much.

I've decided to move to Portland and pursue a career in filmmaking...or commercials or TV or anything of that sort. I'll figure that out later. I know what I want to do, though! I want to do something I love!

On March 2nd I gave my 30 day notice to my roommates. I realized that this summer I want to have as much fun as I can with my best friends and my family and save as much money as I can. I want to work less, so I need a cheaper place to live. I could have just stayed at this house, but I want to start setting things in motion—I'm so excited to move to Portland. My mom convinced me to move back to her house for the summer, and I think I want to start looking for a new job. I like to change things up.

Now I just need to pack up all of my crap and uproot again. Summer is my favorite season, especially in Bend, and as my stress for school subsides, the anticipation grows. I'm so excited for the next few months.


Oh, and I got a haircut. :)

December

I always feel like I should write something really profound, but it's not particularly easy. This month has been a time of growth for me. I often find it difficult to think of what I want, rather than what I should or shouldn't do. This month I did what I wanted, and I've really enjoyed myself. I maintain fairly high standards for myself, and I think I have a rather convoluted idea of the truth of my own story. It's good for me to break loose sometimes and just live. I actually feel that I've matured a bit this month in new ways.

I was very happy to have some old friends come home to visit! Rick even came back from the army for Christmas and the New Year. I won't be able to visit my friends for the next few months because I'm saving up my payed time off from work to visit Dot on the east coast. That will be in April. Also in April I'm planning to move again to a new house. Just looking for a change. I want to be closer to my friends and family, even though I'm still lucky enough to have them in the same town. I don't want it to be inconvenient for people to come visit me. I'll start looking in February or March.

Today I played Dungeons and Dragons for the first time...I feel like such a nerd but that is a very fun game. :) I reached level 2—WOW! Anyway, the only other thing that's new is that I got a promotion at my job! I'm being partially moved up to the office. I'm still the primary shipper for the company but they need help with order entry, and since I'm familiar with everything, having worked in the back, it's pretty easy to pick up the whole beginning process. I now make the orders that I was normally pulling and shipping. It's much more mentally challenging than my other duties, and one lady (who's been there for 10 years) said it's the most frustrating job. So far, though, I really enjoy it! It's really nice to use my brain more; it requires a great deal of concentration and accuracy, and there's also a time crunch—I've been given a raise as well.

I may be rethinking my entire future. I've spoken with a number of people, and it comes down to two things: Either I can take a straight path to a career that I may or may not enjoy, or I take a very windy path to a career that I really enjoy. Everyone has told me to do something I enjoy. I would honestly rather be happy than have a lot of money or be supermodel skinny or have a husband with a lot of money. Of course, I want to be secure, but I'm not really worried about that. I know I can survive just fine on my own; I'm proving that right this second. What I want to do for the rest of my life should be something I love. I have high expectations for myself, and I know I can succeed. I also know it will be difficult, but the journey I take should be spent loving my life rather than worrying about money. We're not going to take it with us when we die. If I have the drive—and I believe I do—I know I can succeed.

I know I'm being very ambiguous, but I don't want to expose too much when I'm not completely sure of what I want to do. Right now I'd like to just do well in school and get in shape! I've been going to the gym. Agh, it's getting late. I need to get up early for work. I bid thee farewell. Thanks for reading!

Waffle

The past month has been pretty wonderful overall. For Halloween I visited a best friend of mine, Sue, in Texas for her birthday. I didn't tell her I was coming; she was so surprised. :) Also, I got my nose pierced! It was excruciating, but I really love it. I have to keep it in for 6 weeks after getting it pierced, so I can take it out sometime in December. We also saw Paramore live in concert! The weekend after Texas I visited Kent at U of O and had one of the best waffles of my life. I'm planning to visit my grandparents for Thanksgiving, and my dad will be there too! I'm probably going to take a train. The only other thing is I joined a gym today and lifted weights. I'll go every Friday so I'll be exercising three times a week instead of just two with Zumba. Otherwise, there aren't really any changes in my life right now. I'm still not sure if anyone reads this, but there you go.

Here's An Update

I'm Out!

Sadly, I don't have any pictures for this entry, as I haven't been out and about much lately. However, I do have some very exciting news: I have finally found a place to live. I'll be renting the master bedroom of a little place in a suburb area close to my work. I was told it's a cop neighborhood so a police officer lives in like every other house. I'll be with two guys, one is a staff member at Teen Challenge, and the other goes to the community college. They're both responsible and the fellow on the lease was looking for someone responsible who will not throw parties at the house since he isn't there very often. Plus I showed up on time so I gained some points for that. I can start moving in October 21st. It's really a terrific situation for me; it's a safe place, the roommates are reliable, I can park in the garage, I get my own bathroom and a big room, and it's close to my work. And I can afford it. I can continue to save my money—did I mention that I don't have to take out any loans while I get my general eds out of the way? I'm just very excited. I'll probably start packing up my belongings soon. Agh, and I need to make another video! :)
One last thing, I have a gig to perform. On the 23rd I'm going to be playing at the Wine Shop downtown from 7 to 9. I am so nervous but so excited.

Downs and Ups

The past few weeks have been full. I've been searching for an apartment or a house or something so I can move out of my mom's house. There's nothing wrong with where I live now, and technically I'm free to do as I please, but I just don't feel completely independent living here. I met two people, both of which didn't work out, and I've been on Craigslist constantly, as well as websites for apartment companies and different property management companies. It's frustrating not finding something, or almost having a place and something going wrong. It's put me under a lot of stress. I'm meeting someone else tomorrow night, so we'll see how that goes.

If I had a good friend that wanted to live with me I would just search for a two bedroom apartment or house and share the costs, but alas, the majority of my close friends have all moved away to various universities. It's hard making new friends. Last week was my first week of school, and I really loved it. My Zumba class is easily my favorite; I was smiling almost the whole time. It is such a fun way to get in shape. If you've never heard of it, it's an intense aerobic dance workout. We're going to learn different routines for different songs, and we get graded on our participation—not our dancing skills (thank goodness). There's a lot of jumping and squats and tons of moving around and clapping and AH! It's so freaking. I have that Mondays and Wednesdays. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I have Writing 121 and Spanish 201. I have a friend from high school in my writing class so it's quite enjoyable. And I just love love Spanish and my teacher is great, so that's a great class too. I may have one friend; she's in my Zumba and my Spanish. It's hard to make friends though! Especially (for me) making girl friends. For some reason I find it much easier to talk to guys. I always feel like girls are judging me, or something. Hopefully I'll make some girl friends this year—I should considering my Zumba class consists entirely of women.

Also, last week was a rather stressful time at work. My manager was out for the week and all of the shipping and handling business depended on me and two of my coworkers. I did all of the shipping almost entirely on my own. And (of course) there were multiple situations that rarely ever happen, and we had to figure them out on our own. I'm really quite proud of us, though. We took care of business and got it done.

Lastly, the most amazing thing happened to me last night. I was walking around downtown at Art Walk and a man stopped me. He said, "Excuse me, but have you ever done any modeling?" I was completely shocked. I laughed and said no. He then told me about this product his company is selling—Flamethrower Firewood. He told me to go to Fred Meyer's and look at Duraflame firewood. It has a picture of a girl on the front. He said I have a great "girl next door" look. (Ha!) It would be me, the firewood, and blazing fire behind me. He's still looking for the fireplace and he'll be in touch with me. I'm gonna take my mom with me, so you all can just chill out about it being sketchy or weird or whatever. I'm very excited. :) And it was just really nice to hear; it really brightened my evening.

I'm thinking this summer I'd like to study abroad in Costa Rica. I have plenty of time to save up, and it seems to be the only study abroad program that will allow me to continue my Spanish education into higher levels (beyond Spanish 203, which I'll be taking spring term). It would be such a great experience. Anyway, that's all for now. I'll write upon the next big development.